Life is what it is

I have tried to understand why people don't like me. I have asked what I do wrong. If it is something I say, do or don't do. You know people won't answer that question. They will not tell you to your face what it is you do wrong. But they will FREELY tell everyone who will listen what an annoying little twit I am. Well, I think that is what they say. I don't know. Because I can't find anyone who will tell me what is being said about me behind my back. The few people who don't care one way or another wouldn't know what is being said. Because they don't care one way or another. Ya I said that already.

What I would like to do is not care either. I mean not care that my family doesn't include me in things going on. Not care that the office will not include me on what is going on for other associates. And not care that as I sit home after surgery not one person from work has emailed me or responded to me posts. I want to scream until every vein pops out of my head. Why do they not care???? What is it that is so taboo about me? I mean honestly, there is an associate in the office that has THE MOST annoying laugh on the planet. She is so LOUD. And they like her. Another one, well she insults everyone that she comes in contact with and virtually calls everyone, including herself, a moron daily. No one does anything right in her book. But they like her. And the other one, well she whines about her love life, her weight, her stomach, her Dad, the weather, and other associates, and they like her. I do at least all that I listed, and maybe throw in my own complaints and ailments and NO ONE can stand me. Well, they tolerate me. They thought I was faking being sick because there seemed to be a sickness going around. They thought I was trying to garner sympathy. Boy did they feel stupid when I actually was sick enough to end up in the ER and eventually operated on. They don't feel sorry. They just feel stupid. And do you think they could send me a card or flowers? Oh hell no. They don't like me. I don't want to go back to a place that doesn't like me.
How do I snap out of this? All I ever wanted, all I have ever hungered, was for people to like me. Call me, friend me, go out with me. Love me. Want to hang with me. Share with me. And I can't seem to get people to do that. Even online, if I go into a chatroom, I seem to annoy people there and they boot me out. What am I doing wrong? What vibe am I giving off? And why won't anyone take me seriously about this?
When I ask for them to tell me what I am doing wrong, I mean it. Seriously. Just tell me. And then I will know. Simple as that. But is is like I am trying to get them to tell me their password to their bank account. They are not budging. So I go online and blog it. I still can't get people to give me an opinion on what they THINK it could be. I can't even get people to read my blogs. I don't know how to tag them to get people's attention. Do I sound like Eyore yet? I guess I had better go now...(monotone)